Lessons
Lesson Info
The Approach
We want to work from the outside in, because if we change our behaviors, we change our impact and we change our own experience of ourselves. This what I mentioned earlier, I came out of the world of fitness into this world of business communication, it seems like they don't overlap but they really do because when we change the way we move and use our bodies, it can change the way we experience ourselves so my approach to working with helping you grow your voice is an outside in approach. That means we're gonna do something and then see how it makes you feel and what your experience is of that and then let that outside in integrate into who you actually are. It's sort of like going for a run. Nobody every really feels like going for run, I mean maybe there's some special percentage of you folks out there who just feel like going for a run but a lot of us don't feel like it but we do it anyway and 10 or 12 minutes into it all of a sudden we feel like going for a run. We're going to do an...
outside in approach that same way, we're gonna change the behavior and change your experience. This stuff though, I will say, is a little, can feel a little bit weird, you might try on one of these boss moves today and for those of you who watching at home, you may try on one of these boss moves into a mirror or into a recording device so you can capture how it looks in the end and it's gonna feel a little awkward it's gonna feel a little bit not fluid, it's gonna feel like you're stepping into a version of yourself that doesn't feel like yourself. And what I want to do is invite you to invite those other versions in so that you can grow your range of how you can communicate so that you can draw on these as the context demands from you. So context, speaking of which context is absolutely everything, for some of you the boss move number one might be just like yes, that and that's so simple I'm gonna do that for 20 times until it feels super natural to me. For others of you another one might be more powerful so these are not, these boss moves don't live in absolutes, they don't have value in and of themselves, they have value when you pair them with who you are and then see if it gives access to a different version of yourself that you wanna have play, at play all the time. So, so just know that this is yours, it's really about taking something on that's contextually yours. So, context is absolutely everything and the question is, which boss moves are gonna work for me? Which one will work for me? I'd like you to take just a second and think of what are, what are the qualities and characteristics you observe in a strong communicator? Think back at the moments where you've sat in an audience across a table, on a conference call, in a webinar. What are some of the things you notice that are characteristics or qualities of a strong communicator? And if somebody in the room would like to grab a mic, you can speak into it to share your thoughts there. Does anybody have a thought? I like them to get to the point. Right, straight to it, great, great. Right, like what is this about, like that? Yeah. Yeah. Good, yes, right here? I'd say animated, full of energy. Animated, say more about that. Oh, so like to use you as an example, you're using gestures, you're changing your tone and pitch. Changing tone and pitch, that's great. Keeping the audience captivated the whole time. That's great, that's great. Yeah, animated, so when I think about animation I always wanna know like what kind of animation? Because the context can sometimes dictate what kind of animation is gonna be the right kind. When you're on a conference call, what do you have? All you have is your voice so that's the place where animation happens, when you're in an enormous stage with an audience at a big conference your animation is gonna look way different than it would be in a 20 person conference room so everything is calibrated to the context, right? We're gonna dial it up, dial it down and leverage these different, these different things, different boss moves in different ways depending on a context. Who else, strong communicator? Yes, right here, Irene, and I'll come back here. Strong communicator also displays warmth and they try to connect to the audience and they look directly at the audience. Maybe they share personal stories that make them look more vulnerable. Yeah, I love that. And sometimes what looks, what is a physical behavior, a thing that we do, you know like approach your audience while you're talking, can feel like warmth on one person and can feel like combative on another. So this is where I go back to like, this has to be so much about how you experience yourself and how the world might experience you, yeah? Back here? Yeah, I agree with all of those and I'd also say a really strong flow so the audience can follow along without feeling like each point is kind of all over the place, A, B, C, rather than you know, A to B, or A to D. Right, right, there's some logical flow to it right? It build on itself so we can track with you all the time. That's great, great, I love that. Over here? Charisma. Charisma? Yeah, charisma. So what are, how do you get, what it charisma? How do you get that? I think charisma's when you're really being yourself. Yes! Right, you know, that's probably what comes out is like, being authentic. Yeah, and that's what, so that's, it's funny, this is, when I ask like, people say, I wanna be charismatic, right? I wanna be authentic, but that's not enough for me to coach to that, to say, be authentic. What do I actually do? So that's what I mean by outside in. We're gonna try on some behaviors that if they work for you, all of a sudden they access, they let you access a part of yourself that lets you speak from a place that's super aligned to who you are, that makes space for how you need to show up so that you can speak in a way that feels authentic to us, right? And it might feel awkward to you but because it's new, it's not how you're used to hearing yourself all the time, it may be an access point to a more powerful authentic version of yourself but it's not, it's not a thing where I can just say be authentic or be charismatic, what are the things that you can do that help grow that? I'm hoping one of the four boss moves you see today will do that for some of you in the room. One more over here and then we'll move on. Was there another one? I would add projection and clarity 'cause somebody may have, may be a great topic so interesting but projecting your voice is really important along with clarity just because technology difficulties or issues can come within. Yeah, and in projection, we're gonna touch, that sort of touches on two of the boss moves that we're gonna talk about today. What's interesting about projection is sometimes it's not just about volume. It's about enunciation and pace, it's about the things that we can do to our words that help them travel to you and it's not just about cranking a bunch of volume. And also, also very contextual. I have, my voice, even when I'm actually speaking very quietly still go around corners, it will go around corners, my husband's voice, I couldn't get it to touch that back curtain back there even if he's using, he's speaking from his diaphragm, right? So, where our voice is registered, we can bolster it that sense of, sort of, we can make our voices charismatic with more than just volume. It can help but there are other places we can touch on that. Yes, back here? One more is a humor and also metaphor. Sure, metaphor's very power, we need to think about content and we're gonna spend most of the time on delivery today, but when you think of content, metaphor can be very powerful, particularly if you're explaining or sharing something that is difficult to grasp, you know this feels really abstract, you can make it into a metaphor, which I know in and of itself is an abstraction, can still be very helpful, especially if they're familiar ones. Really really good. So all of these things are absolutely true and most of these can be touched on with the four boss moves that we're talking about today. So, so, we're gonna start today with one of the four, you know I call them, we call them boss moves in here but really they're like little levers we can toggle to crank up your charisma. Little levers we can toggle to grow the impact of your words that they can actually make it all the way out to the people that are listening.
Ratings and Reviews
Felicia Tan
This is a super helpful class! It helped open my eyes to how to communicate better just by changing the speed and volume of how I talk, as well as paying attention to the beginning and end points. She is easy to listen to and follow, both a good teacher and speaker. I loved the exercises she did live with the audience members, and I felt a lot of their feedback was helpful too. I liked her teaching style, and I could definitely watch her for a 3 day seminar if I had to, but luckily this class is short, concise, with no fluff and very helpful.
Lorena Villegas
Dia's style of coaching is fantastic. Its not a one size fits all approach and she is skilled in relaying her feedback in a way that is incredibly constructive and supportive. Dia's energy is genuine and sincere. It's her personality and presence that kept all of us engaged and wanting to learn more.