The Nervous Negotiator
Vanessa Van Edwards
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The Nervous Negotiator
what if you're a nervous negotiator first I understand completely. I've so been there, I have two strategies. I want to think about. This is if you're nervous negotiator or if you had a really rough year and there's a lot of anxiety and fear coming out of the pandemic of what's happening next. two Things. 1 I really believe in negotiating wingman or wing women sometimes having a partner, they're not only a business partner but a lawyer. Uh your your sassy assistant, you're confident best friend. I regularly bring a second person with me who gives me confidence. That could be someone related to business, but it also could be someone that I just trust and value their opinion. If you have a lawyer friend who's willing to just walk over with you and stand in the background or hop on the back of that video call, oh my goodness, it is so worth it. So I want you to think about the people in your life, business, professional and personal who give you confidence, professional, confidence could ...
be your accountant, could be your lawyer, could be a friend, is a lawyer, could be your assistant, could be your business partner, could be your marketing savvy best friend. Any of those people can join your negotiations. A lot of people think oh I have to do it by myself. No, if you're a business owner, yes, I know you're a chain or a jack of all trades, that doesn't mean you can't bring in Greg who's really good at carpentry, right? Like he can come too, so feel free to bring a wingman or a wing woman that's really helpful. They don't even have to be necessarily formerly associated with your business. They can just be a savvy person 2nd. If you can't actually bring them mentally, bring them so little mental trick that we can do. It's called reflected reappraisal in psychology which is that you can get yourself into more confidence or more courage by adopting the values of someone you admire and respect. So think about someone you admire and respect and imagine them negotiating on your behalf. What would they say? How would they feel? How confident would they be sometimes just keeping that person in mind and thinking about what they would say or what they would do can be a game changer and actually being in the room. So either bring that wing woman, bring me in the room or I can be like in your on your shoulder some my negotiating students that they think of my voice when they're negotiating. You can do it, you got it to just watch this video right before you walk in in the car on your commute, you got it, you can do it, this is research, this is what good business owners do.
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