Lessons

Lesson Info

Balancing Career and Life

so we can talk about balancing your life and career which is something that I know most of the mums that I've worked with over the last few years have really had some challenges with and it's something that I've had some challenges with us well so you know it's not easy it's not easy being a mom it's not easy being a business owner even if you're not a mom running a business is one of the hardest things I have ever done so trying to juggle all of that with your family and making sure that you can have a life that you enjoy and you can have an incredible korea that it's so rewarding you know you're gonna have to become like a an incredible juggle are like it's just it's so hard at times and I'm still guilty of it still still so guilty of it so I'm going to talk about a few steps that I have put in place and they're rules that I had to give to myself and without rules and boundaries what happens we set out children rules and boundaries when they're growing up why can't we give ourselves ...

rules and boundaries something to live by something to abide by and by doing that you know you are you are working within you know your limitations and identifying those so setting office hours I mentioned it before when you are replying to emails to do that in office hours yes sometimes it might be easy when you're sitting there at eleven o'clock at night if you were still sitting at your computer at eleven o'clock at night go to bid lay beside your husband set office hours for your filing said office hours for when you are making cold back set office hours for so many things everything that is involved with in your business we've talked about creating a polish in procedures manual for new staff members you should still have one of those for yourself you have an employee you paying yourself a salary we've talked about that in the pricing segment set yourself business hours because if you have a studio that is somewhere else you have to go there after work certain hours you go there a certain time that's fine if you work for an employer you start at nine a m you finish it five being whatever your hours are you have set business hours do it for your own business I work I feel like I work twenty four hours a day but I'm in my office while my children are at school and I try really really really hard not to be in my office while my children are home after school when they need help with their homework when they needed there often and tea when they need their dinner prepared all of those things I go back into my office when my kids go to bid I don't watch tv I'm not a not someone who likes to go and sit and watch you know tv sometimes I do when I need to switch off but for the majority of the time I really enjoy sitting in editing my images I find it very soothing I put music on that's my time I can switch off I can think about all the new things that I want to do but that's me personally if you want that tv time that's fine I don't want to go and sit and watch tv with my husband because he's watching shows I don't wantto watch on then fine he gets that it's absolutely fine but that's our relationship I'm not into documentaries on finding gold I like tio you know what your movie if I wanna watch tv I'm going to go to the cinemas I'm going to see a great movie and that's a reward for me getting out of the house and doing something um so sichel business hours but don't let them run your life for rule your life and just because you work at home and you hear an email come in and then you have to run and see what it is it's going to still be there it's not going anywhere and if somebody wants to contact you urgently I'm sure that person who needs you urgently urgently already has your phone number so our client inquiry should be answered within business hours let people know when your business hours are put them on your website put them on your block put them on your facebook page they need to know when you work so that they if they do send you an e mail at ten eleven o'clock at night they're not going to get a response they need to know that they're not expecting a response or they're not going to expect you to be at their beck and call whenever they need you you can check them on unless it's his urgent I can't make my session tomorrow morning that's fine but you don't need to reply unless you absolutely have to sichel working hours and most importantly have a holiday I've talked about it before my husband and I go away every year on our wedding anniversary so that we can set goals and make plans for the following twelve months that's what we love that time we look forward to it every year where we going this time it's always got to involve a beach though because there's nothing like sitting on a beach and just listening to the sound of the waves and taking that time for yourself you need to take a break and you need to re evaluate you need to laugh you need to enjoy life and de stress and take a love those things that you've been worrying about all those things that have been scaring you about higher potentially hiring staff or just the fact that you're running a business and it is scary you need to take that time away from those things and just to you know restore restart basically comeback energized willing to fight and put time and if it into that because if you don't you're just going to run yourself into the ground and one day going to get up and you're not going to be able to do it or you're not gonna have the energy annual leave when you work for an employer you are designated so many weeks of the year as holiday pay depending on your you know your contract whether you are part time or full time as a business owner you need to also have annual leave I know that when I worked for an employer the ceo of that company had annual leave on the ceo of my company I need a holiday I work damn hard I want to enjoy myself you need to do that for yourself and know when to say no when is it too much when you're taking on too many clients if you were taking on too many clients you might be charging not enough because everyone's thinking wow she doesn't incredible work she's not charging enough when do you say no when do you start to value yourself and your time and either increase your prices or go no I simply can't do it because if you are continually working and running yourself into the ground because she can't say no you are not going to be giving all of your clients one hundred ten percent every time they come in eventually it's going to become ninety percent it's going to get less and less and less and your reputation as a service provider will become less they will stop referring their friends and clients it's the follow through from every single segment we've talked about it all follows through set boundaries rules live by them in your life and your business I just I can't emphasize that enough and it took me a really long time to do that the boundaries in my life where whatever I was like such a carefree person we'll be fine we'll do that I still struggle with boundaries I bring my friend garrett I might carry I've got this really great idea and he's like yeah because he's heard all my ideas so set boundaries know your limitations and what you can and can't do we can't or work twenty four hours a day and expect to continually give everybody one hundred percent of our time and energy it just doesn't work it's it's not possible because you then have to recognize at what point you neglecting part ofthe you your life and your business my health started to fail my family was being neglected and my relationship was failing because my husband worked away and when he came home I was so tired and I was so over the arguing of my kids because I wasn't giving them enough time and I was feeling so down on myself because I had gained so much weight that he would come home and I'd be like you take those kids they're yours I need a break and he'd be like I've just worked eleven hours straight of driven two thousand kilometres he was running he had three projects he had thirteen hundred staff members underneath him did I think about him no I didn't like god I just need a break take them and he didn't want them like he needed time he needed to come home and unwind a cz well and I didn't see that so we started to move in different directions I love my husband more than anything in this entire world we're best friends and I neglected my best friend so when it comes to taking that break that holiday we sat down and my life what are we going to do to fix this I kind of imagine my life without you and he said well god are kind of imagine my life without you what we gonna do about it no amount of money is worth that time away from your family none no amount of money so he quit his job stress levels went up but we were together so we could take on that burden together and now we started to move in the right direction yes we bumped heads at times but it's because we're different people so then again we had to pull back and go right what are our own strengths and weaknesses what are we capable of doing and how we gonna make this work right you're gonna look after this this and this and I'm gonna look after this I love the creative side would never give that up to anybody ever hey so good with numbers why would I even consider doing that we'd be bank route so you know when you when you look at you know where e way start why we pick up a camera and you know for me it was like photography from me was an outlet I worked ridiculous hours prior to having a baby I worked two thirty eight weeks of my pregnancy and my boss said right you're going to be back in a couple of weeks can I see you monday I'm like I'm about to have a baby because he couldn't imagine my life without him six weeks after my baby he's ringing me saying when you coming back I couldn't go back I couldn't do it I couldn't leave that child I couldn't stop looking at it it changed my world but I didn't need something to do I was bored and I picked up a camera I said taking million photos that's how I started in this I did photography in high school even though I was learning how to use a camera and had a process film I had mohr I had more energy for the boys that were in the dark room then I did what was I was actually doing so you know my focus was was kind of jilted at times but um I still loved it and my grandfather loved photography he gave me my very first book that was written in the nineteen twenties the elements of photography it is my most prized position we didn't have a camera growing up we couldn't afford one and whenever we went to my grand parents place everybody would always go there at the same time with the cousins would be running around and and my grandmother has albums and boxes of photos there's so many and there's nothing better than sitting on the floor and going through them and looking at you know what people used to look like and laughing about all the outfits we usedto wear and things like that I loved that I realized the importance of photography and I wanted teo to create those same moments in memories from my family so that's where I came from my camera then became a tool and then my business evolved and before I knew it I was running a fully fledged business and all of a sudden all these different areas of my life were falling apart I put on so much weight I've never been overweight in my life I once walked on a catwalk with a swimsuit and I looked in the mirror and I was disgusted absolutely disgusted I couldn't stand the sight of myself and then my relationship started to fail because I was like how can he even look at me but that was my perception not here so I can completely let go myself completely and utterly threw myself into my business my family was getting back on track always like so in love with my family and making everything work that when I finally saw myself on camera when I had this incredible opportunity to come to creative live and share what I love doing when I saw myself on like oh my god where did I go was gone I wasn't may inside it was but I hid behind the fact that I didn't look the way I was so I was afraid to actually put my personality out there and let people see who I really wass and the hardest thing was at what point do I change my life I got up on christmas day over twelve months ago and my kids have these little polaroid cameras and they took a photograph of may sitting there in my pajamas while they're unwrapping their presence in what's supposed to be one of the most incredible memories that we look back on in years to come and all I could say was how fat I wass how disgusting I would looked in that photo and never wanted anybody to see me like that but that's me personally and no one else told me I was fat actually a little bill did once at a park but that's another story she did you know her mom's a runner and I would go to the park and she trains all the kids in our area she's a lovely woman she's really incredible and her four girls also run and my kids are running and she comes up to me and says my month is you don't run because you fat yes for mummy's right but you know I had to identify that in myself and when I saw that picture I'm like that's it I've got to do something about this I've got to get myself back so I can be me confidently being the body that I love because if you don't love yourself how is anybody else gonna love here I didn't allow my husband to love me because I couldn't love myself it was just it was one of the the hardest things to recognize in myself and yeah you know like my good friend sue and I we looked at each other and we're just look at where we've come from finally we can be happy finally we can enjoy ourselves and feel good about the way we look and feel oh and and yet it's finally but there was a point and there is a point for everybody there were crime I'm trying really hard not to okay so I'm dancing around up here and try not to look at interview I'm gonna lose it identifying what areas that you are neglecting means that you need to ask for help when you can identify that you're neglecting a part of your family a part of your business yourself you need to ask for help ask the childcare doesn't have to be a child case into this family daycare centers in people's homes there's o peers if you are a mom that wants to take her business to the next level you need teo look at what you're doing and figure out where you need help ask for help no one's gonna think any less of you because you have to put your hand up and say I can't do it all no one's even going to give you a medal if you're trying to do it all not even on mother's day you are not going to get a medal for thinking that you can do it all ever you need an assistant if you can't do it all and you need to let your friends and family help let him help you my poor mother has been looking after my kids while I'm here she wants to help me because she knows how much this means to me value yourself in your business and the reason I say this is because when you start to value your business and yourself the person the people around you will the reason my friends and family want to help me it's because they know how much I value my business they know how much I love what I do you know without that if you don't value it what's the point in doing it what is the point in actually you know running a business and doing that your mind is we'll give it all up now and go on work for somebody else have sit business hours get paid a salary get paid a wage whatever it is come home and have that time set some rules set some boundaries and then start to value yourself is a person and don't neglect the people that mean the most to you I don't I don't know how to say it any other way sometimes you need to be told those things to be able to understand that it's actually okay okay to value yourself I'm a good person I would never hurt a fly I deserve to value myself my husband would give the shirt off his back to somebody who needed it we're good people we deserve to be successful do you deserve to be successful in what you do do you allow yourself to be successful if you are not valuing yourself over your business no you don't need deserved to be successful when you start to do that and you make your business work for you then you then you deserve to be successful we all deserve to be successful we all deserve to value ourselves because we're good people you know I just I here so often from so many people you know ah you know I just I don't know how to do it or you know I've got excuses or I can't do this because ofthe this reason you know stop making excuses and start doing stop putting into action some rules some boundaries and identifying the areas of your life in your business that need help I think that's probably one of the most important things ever that you could do in your business is value yourself over it it's your business it's my business I have to value myself above it because it won't run successfully if I don't if I put everything else first I'm going to go backwards again I don't want to do that I am so ready to charge forward and be a force to be reckoned with and when somebody tells me that I can't do something oh my god am I gonna prove them wrong I've said I was told that I would never make it in this industry I've been told before buy you know an ex boyfriend's father when I was seventeen that I was materialistic and I would never amount to anything because I had left school I wasn't working on my education I had two jobs though by the way and I had to prove him wrong that gave me dr so find what drives you get that determination be passionate about what you love doing take risks if you don't take risks in your business you're not going to move forward everything is scary was saying that everything's so scary when you're doing it but if you don't take those risks and face that fear head on you will stay doing what you're doing treading water every day you won't move forward your business won't grow it won't evolve this whole boot camp has been about putting everything in place so that you can take it forward to the next level I can't tell you step by step how to do it you've got to find that within yourself I had to nobody showed me how to do it I made mistakes I learned from them and I moved forward find that drive get determined to get a fire underneath you be passionate and love what you do so much I cannot say it any more in another way and take risks and then you need to set goals quick together with the people around you if you don't have people around you work work on your goals yourself you need to set personal goals you need to sit business goals and you need to set goals for your family where do you want your family to go what are they doing we're going to go on that holiday next year when you've allocated annual leaved for yourself I'm taking my kids to disneyland I said two years ago and I bloody did it do you know how much I've wanted to go to disneyland since the age of twelve when my father remarried um a woman you know we weren't exactly getting along she had taken her children to disneyland and she talked about it all the time I've never been anywhere we didn't have a car we didn't have a telephone I lived in a two bedroom unit I have come from nothing all I ever wanted was to go to disneyland and I took my three kids there and they loved every second of it I didn't go on a ride I didn't do anything I just stood back and I took it all in and I remember everything second of it because it's means so much to me to actually be able to do that but if I hadn't have set that as a goal to go on that holiday to take my family somewhere that meant so much to me you know it here just yet I want to ask everybody what are they doing to set goals and they're all crying still stop it her setting case currently setting goals in their business anybody would love to hear them being my husband actually sat down at they begin off this year and we set goes for ourselves and I said to go for my business when I want to go with and what I want to do and he did as well for himself so we are working towards that just now and just going back on to talk to your husband and be on the same page he helps me a lot and when I'm sorry but when I was told that I could come here I wasn't sure he would be okay with it because you'd have to get time off work and it was so quick and he didn't thought twice to say just cool and he was in houston is because they just go and I was like what is it school oh oh sorted out all sorted out the kids just go and he is like he's always cheating for me for me to get here and he also tells me you know step back let other things happen in just focus on what you want and I just tried to put too much try to do too much and I'm just not manage interest now having that support is incredible but you have to allow them to support you and it comes back to that neglect allow your family and friends to support you and help you through it and identify like you said the areas that you need help with but they're few your friends and family that's why their friends and family there always gonna be there to support you setting those goals though you have to do them but then you have to re evaluate them every year because your goals are going to change as you grow as you evolved within your business as your family gets older your goals are going to change they're not always going to be the same re evaluate them put it in your diary pick a weekend it's easy for us it's the ninth of november every year the day we got married and we've now been married twelve years going on thirteen and we've been doing this for the past four set goals every year re evaluate them you've been setting goals set new ones this year without those goals you won't have a plan if you don't have a plan how do you create a business plan or a marketing plan how do you set your pricing structure up for the following year everything again we've covered is all coming into play right here right now created policies and procedures manual that's what you've got to do to be able to abide by those rules but set them for yourself and for your business and for your family has anybody else setting some goals that they want to share I would love to hear them I'm sure our online audience would really love to hear them well my life in my situation has actually very recently changed up two to three weeks ago I was working two full time jobs with an average of seventy hours a week for months and house just burned out and I just exploded I went to five doctors nobody found anything so I was completely fine until tow the last doctor I said I'm not fine I'm not you khun like all my tests were good but I was just not feeling fine and he was like well you're just like beyond stressed on dh I really relate to your story probably I come from nothing and I have always felt I had nothing to lose that's why I moved everywhere and I tried things and you know everywhere in the world and until I found something that I loved on I recently got married and I still had that chip in my head saying you had nothing you have nothing to lose but actually dio I have a husband now andi hadn't realized that on dh there was no space in my life for him or anything personal and yeah so I stopped the other job on dh I create a set of goals that I wanted to do with you know getting back to my relationship on dh hobbies and just enjoying life going to like working out and just going out in the street with the camera and just like photographing birds and flowers because I did that and I I don't have time for that anymore like a personal project with photography or art in general andi I set myself a couple goals which included like more time for myself my husband doing things I like and especially working on building my business and everything that I loved doing and get you know goingto workshops and doing things that I love on the day after I got an email from creative life so it was the best time ever it's like good timing creative life and so I mean this opportunity means I don't even know how to explain what it means um but yeah so thank you and I wear a mess but thank you for also I guess I speak for everyone thank you for being so open about your personal story because I mean many I guess including us have you like oh my god it's kelly around but it's like you're a person you're human and you've you've started somewhere and you started from from nothing so it's thank you for showing us that you are welcome it's um it's not common practice in australia to be able to receive praise compliments that easily so thank you very much and I'm learning really I'm learning so much about you know accepting praise from other people and allowing myself to it because I think often enough we don't receive it and to be able to give you need to be able to receive whole heartedly so when someone pays you a compliment take that thank you very much it means the world that you're all here but you know what I love what you said that you do have something to lose now you have a husband to lose and when I say when I'm talking about you know what have you got to lose I mean when you put yourself out there by putting yourself out there in front of your clients for may putting myself out there and being recorded in a three minute video and and submitting it to creative live all those years ago for a seal spotlight I put myself out there I had nothing to lose in that respect but when it comes to running my business and setting boundaries and making my work and my my life balance I've got so much to lose so much to lose and I'm not prepared to give that up for anybody or anything I would turn clients away before I would allow my family to suffer any more because now I know I've seen it you know they have my priority my business works for me because now I have all these systems in place I've set goals for the following year tiu reevaluate my my boundaries and my rules and that's what we have to be consistent with the minute you fall back on any of those areas things will start to crumble depends on how far you actually want to take it as well I think we've got one more one more question I just wanted a touch piece on the goals and my hardest thing is the self hate when you were talking about the weight and watching your kids and everything putting studena policies in place or put keeping all that can be really easy because you have ah oh goal or a checklist and stuff like that but fighting the value in yourself and stop in that the hatred herself is a lot harder the heart golder reached then reaching a monetary value or anything like that yeah it is it is hard that valuing yourself in your time is the hardest thing in your business and not hating yourself and feeling guilty because you are spending so much time working my god the amount of times that I have said to my kids I'll be done in a minute I don't want them to ever feel like I'm not available I didn't have that growing up my parents separated when I was really young I lived with my dad from the time I was eleven to the time I was fourteen and he had to work two jobs to provide for him and I so he would come home after work and I'd see him for about an hour before he would go off to his next job I made my dinner every night from the age of eleven I've got an eleven year old would never allow her to go through what I went through she doesn't pack your own lunch box I did that for years I had to wash I had to cook I had to vacuum I had to work hard for absolutely everything I have there are no excuses and it got to the point where I was just so sick to death off the way I treated myself and no monetary value is worth that I would rather be dead broke then put myself back in that position I let it go and I didn't identify it so I needed to reevaluate I needed to put my hand up and say hey I'm actually worth this regardless of what everybody else has said to me that is what has given me dr regardless of everybody else out there I am with it I'm a human being people love mei mei family need me my children love me no matter what I look like or what I am how big I am they couldn't care less I look like in a photo they love me but I didn't allow them to love may I didn't allow my family to love me because I didn't love myself giving yourself permission to do that is one of the hardest things you will ever do but you are all worth it every single one of you is worth it and I don't know what point we stop thinking that we're worth it you know the majority of people that I work with our moms and we are all experiencing the same thing you are worth it your husband loves you children are gonna love us regard lee of regardless of what we look like but you have to be able to love yourself you've got to be able to do that for your business to be able to grow so you can put all of that time and energy into it you have to be in a good place to be able to do that otherwise it'll be half asked I don't know if that's an australian or an american thing you know one hundred percent of your time and energy to making your business evolve and grow when you have your business cap on during your set business hours you can't do that and you won't wholeheartedly do that if you don't value yourself otherwise you will get to a point where you will fill burnt out you will go to the doctor's and you will be exhausted you will be extra est your family will suffer you will suffer your relationships will suffer I've lost so many friends over these because I wasn't available to them I'm a terrible friend I've got good friends now because it's a two way street or relation gunships are two ways you can't expect people to keep giving and giving and giving if you are not giving anything back so you need to set goals and focus on where you want to be a personal goals right I want to get back down and to the size that I was gonna fit back into those clothes I did it in twelve months but I had to make a really big adjustments without setting those goals I couldn't make a plan I didn't know how to lose that weight I've lost twenty eight kilos I don't know how much that equates to impounds in twelve months because I put my mind to it I said that as a goal to get my life back to love myself again to feel good in the clothes I put on and to feel confident I want to feel like a confident business person when I'm dealing not only with my clients but when I am promoting my business when I'm advertising my business when I walk up to somebody in the street and I say oh wow I've noticed how amazing you look you look incredible when you do I only do it was really heavily pregnant that women because I did ask somebody once that and they weren't pregnant big mistake right foot mouse going on there but I need to feel confident in everything I do so it all ties in together it all ties in together so I'm going to set you all a challenge and all of you that is sitting here I want to hear from you and everybody that's in our facebook group I'm going to set you a challenge I'm gonna ask you to set some goals some personal goals family goals and then business goals you have to value yourself over your business that's why I said your personal your family and your business put yourself first for a moment as a mom we don't do that we always put our children first then it might be her husband then it might be a business and then it us and we sit behind a computer and we work away through the ours because we can't be we can't we can't look at ourselves we switch off we get so sick and tired of looking in the mirror what we don't like about ourselves that we just decide not to look at it anymore until it gets to a point I challenge you to set those goals you don't have to share them but just do it absolutely and most importantly stop making excuses we've had some conversations all of us here in the room in the last few days about you know where we're at in our business and our life I've shared with you my personal story some of them I haven't exactly had the best upbringing I haven't had an incredible life it's been filled with lots of adversities but I've made the most of every situation and I've just continued to push through because I finally valued myself and I thought I'm worth it I am actually worth being here I deserve to be standing right here doing this because I've put the hard yards in I have frickin earned this I deserve it don't tell me an excuse don't say I can't do it because of this this and this identify those this this and this is and address them and find a solution for them if you want something so bad you will work hard towards it but if you're going to continually make excuses you won't evolve you won't grow you won't get to that place where you want to pay I don't ever wanna hear excuse when I'm talking to somebody about it and don't worry about what I'm doing this's may I'm different to every single one of you and I have had a different upbringing to every single one of you even though some people have similarities were different people I worry about you worry about your business no one else and stop making excuses I've got my mommy had on now on do the work I don't have to come on about that because I just said I'm standing here for a reason and I deserve it not an egotistical way because I know that I've worked so goddamn hard to actually be here I've raised my children I'm going to continue raising them until I die but now it is my turn there it's school now I run my business and ironic successfully and I run it to suit my needs my family it works for me do the work and it will in turn return what you put out there you will get back absolutely you said you want to sit in that chair where I sat you've got to do the work to get there and if you're prepared to do whatever it takes to get there without sacrificing anything because you do have something to lose you will get there but you actually have to do the work I didn't win the lottery I'm here because I put myself forward and I've worked my butt off to get here you have to do it when you reach your goal you can celebrate I'm gonna celebrate very soon when I go on a holiday with my family when I take annual leave you celebrate with him like you would not believe because I celebrate every year when we go away that time it means the world to me if you don't set goals you won't plan you won't reach them and you won't have anything to celebrate I love to celebrate I love to party and I will with my family and then again he do it over it's like rinse and repeat rinse and repeat just keep going keep doing it until you've had enough until one day you decide I'm gonna retire now and if you love what you do you will find that passion and it will drive you we've talked about that over and over again you really have to do that loving what you do is so easy you know it's so easy to do if you allow yourself to do it when you get caught up in all the other things that aren't necessarily going to plan and you get overwhelmed it's easy to fall out of love with what we do if we don't you know allow that time for ourselves to restore refresh recharge reboot you're going to find it really hard to stay in love with what you do and we have to remember that the reason we picked up that camera was because we love taking photographs take that time walk outside take your camera do personal projects that's why I do them every year I photographed my family I enter those images into awards because it helps push me in in a way that I have never been pushed before but it also allows me to do something do something creative outside of the norm and do something for myself because I I've got to remember why I picked up that camera why do I why why my photographer because I loved what I do my sister said to me before I came away with an incredible thing one incredible thing to love and be so passionate about what you do and your job take ownership of your businesses and run them the way you want them to be run and allow yourself to love what you do but unfortunately if you don't put all those systems in place all those plans you don't set boundary set rules he will eventually fall out of love with what you were doing and don't sacrifice your family and your children for that it's not worth it ever it is not worth it we pick up that camera because we love to take photographs then we have to become business people so be a business person love what you do and love yourself so that you can be successful at it and then you can celebrate it's such a wonderful thing to be able to acknowledge that you've achieved something it's such a wonderful thing I can't I can't say it any other way it's a really I have so much gratitude right now and I have for the last couple of years at where my business has taken may and the people that I've met the journey I've been on I haven't so grateful I love it that much but I had to allow myself to and he can't get caught up in what everybody else is doing and compete with them all the time that we spend online all the time that we spend out there looking for gratitude from other photographers cut it out stop of asking people to like your facebook page is if they're not clients quality versus quantity stop wasting your time on other photographers unless they're somebody that is mentoring you or helping you stop following other people that do not have an impact on your business don't allow them to have an impact on you which will then refer to your business stop spending your time scrolling through mundane news feeds don't allow yourself to get caught up in the negativity in groups if somebody makes a negative comment on a post that you do or in a group move on how you let that affect you is your call I wouldn't even know if there's people out there making negative comments about may I really wouldn't know if people out there don't like me online I really don't care it has no direct effect on my business and my family because I don't allow it to because I value myself and I value my family so much I'm not going to let any person out there who decides to grossett just because they're sitting behind a computer screen I really would not know how many people are out there doing whatever because we're gonna waste my time that time could be spent poured into my business that time could be spent marketing finding those clients that time could be spent with my children at a park that time could be spent with my husband in the back you are digging up a weed I don't know stop comparing yourself in competing with other photographers they are not you they're not in the same life situation that you're in right now when you're looking for inspiration for your photography looked a photographer's that you admire find them the photographers I follow there's probably two newborn photographers because I'm continually learning I'm learning from other photographers that so incredible in their business or create magnificent pieces of work whether it's with you know conceptual photography or landscape photography think outside the square stop wasting your time on social media comparing yourself to everybody else and how many likes they've got on their facebook page who gives a shit whether you've got two hundred likes or two hundred thousand likes who cares that's them that's their business that's what they've done to do that start focusing on what they've done and what they're doing and focus on your own if you want more than two hundred like stop looking at their two thousand two hundred thousand likes focus stop competing so you can enjoy life enjoy that time at the park with your kids enjoy that time outside with your family enjoy that time reading a book I don't remember when I read a book not that actually liked reading but if that's what you like doing and spend that time with your husband go for a walk get outside smell the fresh air my husband loves photography as well and it's so fun to go out just with our cameras and photograph something the success of your business could be suffering because you are not allocating the appropriate amount of time towards it because you're wasting it you're wasting at being negative you're wasting it because your self worth is so low that you're constantly looking at other people and thinking why aren't my image is good as theirs why am I not doing that you know stop asking why and do and then you've gotta ask yourself what is it that you want do you want to be part time do you want to have a successful business or like tell me do you want to stand in my shoes do you want to win the awards do you want to just have a successful business do you want to earn enough money to be able to provide for your family and cover your mortgage and gone good holidays what is it that you want in your business write them down when you're doing your goals plan for it every year write down what it is that you want I wanted to lose why I did it I wanted to go to disneyland I did it I wanted teo teo to win an award with my photography I did it I wanted to prove to people that I was good enough because I've been told that I wasn't I was told that my work wasn't good enough to make it in this industry that's why I enter awards because I'm trying to prove it to myself that I am good enough to do that I've done that I've proved it to myself and the reason I continue to enter them is because I want to continually prove to myself that I can better myself every single year it's not about the awards now it's pushing myself and creating something different and getting better learning constantly I'm still learning there's so much in this world from it alone and there's so much for me to see and do that I know what I want I ride it down every year when I go away with my family when I set goals and then I make plans so I want you to ask yourself what is it that you want because I get so many people that contacted me and they're like I want to do this I want to do that and then when we really talk about it they don't really want it because if they wanted it they do it they do the hard work to get there and they would get there and they would prove everybody wrong really really really think about what it is that you want and how bad do you want it and if you want it really bad you will work hard at it it just depends on how much you wanted to come up and join you callie e I just want to hug you uh um wow let me look at you what I want right now is tio express thie extreme gratitude that wait uh but we all have free thank you you have poured your heart and soul into this boot camp and um the lessons that you've covered I mean we've gone from opposing building our home studios marketing pricing building our business is uh but this is what it's all about um and I could tell right here uh this is the most powerful lesson of it all because self care is the secret totally and we're taught that being selfish is a bad thing and you have given us the tools and the courage to open ourselves up to taking care of ourselves to achieve what we want and on behalf of everybody out there I thank you for your wisdom really um and I I think all of you out there for joining us um and for doing the work and for congratulating yourself on doing that work uh this has been the most incredible boot camp life bootcamp yukio baby theo uh you have kept us all in the beauty uh and and I think you so go out there everyone um find out what you want and go do it for now for newborn posing with kelly brown that's a wrap thank you everyone